Rainbow Light

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zeKieranator

  • Posts: 12
Post #1
Prologue

The moon shone down on the forest last night as two figures approached.

Most people, thinking that the place was abandoned and dangerous, would never go near.

But these two knew Sunlight Forest's secret.

Through they went, past the bushes of ivy, past the fallen trees, past the Hoothoot scattered through the trees.

And just as they reached the row of trees they knew was the boundary, they saw a flash of light off to the left.

They disappeared, and then reappeared as large, silver and black dogs, and shot flames in the direction the light came from. But soon, they were swamped by a wave of water, and shimmered away.

A voice spoke through the forest. "We are one step closer now."

"If that's one step closer, you're running a marathon."

Please note this is my first fic, and any comments would be appreciated.



There are 10 types of people in this world - people who know binary and people who don't.
There are 3 types of people in this world - people who can't count and people who can.



Steele

  • Posts: 349
Post #2
Mmmhhhmmm…..Not bad. Written quite uniquely I have to say…Keep writing. I wish to know what happens after zeh Prologue!



"Do you think I enjoy telling you who you can screw and who you can't?" -Shadowdart

Don't worry about the world coming to an end today, cause' it's already tomorrow in Australia!

tony3106

  • Posts: 16
Post #3
I like the last sentence. Pretty good writing style, but I think "…the Hoothoot scattered through the trees." should be "…throughout the trees." I may be wrong though, and it may be acceptable either way.



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ShinyRedEon =D

  • Posts: 42
Post #4
love your writing style, kinda poetic, but the ending doesn't seem to fit in with the rest of the story. Maybe you should rewrite it to fit in with your writing style for the start.



I am ShinyRedGlaceon.

zeKieranator

  • Posts: 12
Post #5
Chapter 1 : Journey

Beep. Beep.

A young boy rolled over on his bed, still listening to the alarm clock in the background.

Beep. Beep.

“I´ll be right down! Geez, why does the lab open so early?” He got up, brushed off his bright blue T-shirt, and headed downstairs.

The kitchen had always been a great place for him, with its white tiling, sliding glass door and the floral vases scattered decoratively throughout the room. Inside was his mother, as usual, cooking him breakfast.

“Hi, Mom,” he said excitedly. “What´s for breakfast?”

“Your favorite. Fried eggs and toast.” She passed a plate onto the table. “I´m proud of you, Alex.”

“Thanks, Mom. So I guess this is the big day? I mean, what with you waking up at seven o´clock to cook me breakfast…”

“Yup,” she exclaimed. “Just think. My little Alex is finally going on a Pokémon journey. I can´t believe it myself.”

“Mom, I think the toast is burning.” She turned around with a yelp.

“Oh! I´d better turn that off now,” she said to herself. “Do you have your cell phone? Town Map? Trainer´s License? Pokédex?”

“Yes, Mom. Remember, we packed yesterday.” His mom had always been forgetful. “Don´t worry, I´ll try my best to not get killed.”

She sighed. “All right, then. Off you go.”
Alex ran towards the door, but then turned back around.

“Mom, what about my birthday present?”

“Don´t worry. I sent it to the Poké Mart at Lookout Pier. You can pick it up there.”

“Thanks, Mom! Bye!” Alex yelled back as he ran through the doorway.

“I always knew that kid would do well someday.”

Well, that took an annoyingly long time to write.



There are 10 types of people in this world - people who know binary and people who don't.
There are 3 types of people in this world - people who can't count and people who can.



zeKieranator

  • Posts: 12
Post #6
Chapter 2: Alex's First Pokemon

Alex raced through the town, making a beeline for the Pokemon lab. Upon reaching the lab, he stopped, took a deep breath, and opened the door.

He had heard stories about the Pokemon lab being an amazing place, but looking inside, he could see that it wasn't really that much - just a small room with grey walls and ceiling, plus a few pieces of machinery at the back. He walked forward, but soon stopped at the sound of a voice behind him.

"Hello. You must be Alex, right?"

He turned around, and found a somewhat tall person behind him, wearing a lab coat and glasses.

"Yeah, that's right. So are you Professor Maple?"

"Unfortunately, the Professor is out on official business. He did, however, leave me a message, concerning your arrival here, and your present. There are three Poke Balls in the back, choose whichever you want."

When Alex walked over to the back, sure enough, there were three minimized Poke Balls on a tray, colored red, blue and green. After a while of Alex standing in front of the tray, trying to decide which Pokemon to choose, the assistant called out to him, "You'd better hurry up now, there are other trainers waiting," so Alex eventually decided on the blue Poke Ball. Strangely, as soon as he picked it up it changed color into a normal red.

"Good choice. Now get out of here."

And thus, Alex picked up the Poke Ball, attached it to his belt and ran off towards the door.

Just wait until Chapter 3, involving a start of a journey, a Fake Pokemon and a crazy plot twist.



There are 10 types of people in this world - people who know binary and people who don't.
There are 3 types of people in this world - people who can't count and people who can.



zeKieranator

  • Posts: 12
Post #7
Chapter 3: Aquanine

After leaving the lab, Alex rushed off to the edge of Route 601, and stopped. He decided to check out his new Pokemon, and thus grabbed the Poke Ball off from his belt, maximized it and threw it to the ground.

With a flash of red light, the ball revealed a somewhat small blue dog, with wavy ears and black rings around its body.

"Hello there," said Alex to the Pokemon in front of him.

"Well, hello to you too."

Alex was so shocked at hearing this that he almost fainted.

"Wait. Are you saying you can talk?" he asked.

"I never said I could talk. In fact, I simply said hello.

Alex replied,"Well, you're talking. Pokemon don't talk."

"Is that the case? I've always been able to talk."

"Well," said Alex after a moment, "I've never met any other Pokemon wbo can talk."

"But, have you met any other Pokemon at all?"

Alex at first considered this to be somewhat of a silly question, until realizing that no - he hadn't.

"Well… I guess you're the first Pokemon I've met," countered Alex, "but still. Pokemon just don't talk."

"And if we keep standing here discussing the percieved oddities of my abilities to speak, we'll never get anywhere on our Badge journey. So, let's hurry up."

"And somehow, my Pokemon is smarter than me," Alex thought to himself. He looked out at the grassy pathway of Route 601, seeing that hey - he was a Polemon trainer.

"Well? What are you waiting for? The utter collapse of civilization?"

"You're right. Let's get moving." So thus, he recalled his new Pokemon and walked forwards down the road to the next city - and the road to adventure. 



There are 10 types of people in this world - people who know binary and people who don't.
There are 3 types of people in this world - people who can't count and people who can.



Sands Buisle

  • Posts: 351
Post #8
Interesting, so how does the pokemon talk? Telepaphy?



Please check out my Fan Fics (They're in this forum).



I'm not always rational, but I think people think I am.

… errazib nialp tsuj era serutangis emos ,wonk ouy.

Buisle is the ruler of the seven seas of sand, it is the terror of all Floatzel!

Man, I wrote Fics of three different Pokemon story types! What's next?! A wild Pokemon fic?! Hmmmmm…

zeKieranator

  • Posts: 12
Post #9
It's sort of like that. The Pokemon talk normally, but only Alex can hear them. To everyone else, it's just Pika Pikas (or what ever Pokemon is talking).



There are 10 types of people in this world - people who know binary and people who don't.
There are 3 types of people in this world - people who can't count and people who can.



ShinyRedEon =D

  • Posts: 42
Post #10
I like your prologue but the rest has to much talking and needs more desciption.



I am ShinyRedGlaceon.

zeKieranator

  • Posts: 12
Post #11
I know, I've never been that good with description. And, to be fair, it did take me over a year to write that prologue.

Spoiler: The main story has something to do with Morphic.

EDIT: I've decided to rewrite the fic and put it up on the main TCoD forums, but I'm working on Chapter 4, so that should be up here soon.



There are 10 types of people in this world - people who know binary and people who don't.
There are 3 types of people in this world - people who can't count and people who can.



Dynastyphoenix

  • Posts: 3
Post #12
Nice one! it;s got a great, poetic feel to it and it is descriptive. it is a good fanfic for your first try! keep at it!

Dynastyphoenix

  • Posts: 3
Post #13
Im talking about the guy one the top, BTW.

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