Comments on Chapter 58: Sins of the Mother
Pages: 1
CuriousJolteon
Story: The Quest for the Legends (ILCOE)
Chapter: Chapter 58: Sins of the Mother
I like the anticlimax of her father already being dead, and I agree that Letaligon's ending is probably better if she doesn't come back. However, the feeling I've always gotten from this chapter is not that she'll eventually get over this and live happily with her family, but that there's a lot of brand new tension and she may be going into a bad situation where she'll be miserable and purposeless. I think there should be some more here to hint that she'll be okay to really make it work. She just leaves miserably.
I think Mark noticing "something in that final look" was supposed to be that hint, but that's just Mark telling us his hopes. What *we* see when she gives him that look is that she's confused and sorrowful, making it look like Mark is optimistically misinterpreting her because he wants her to be okay.
[06/10/2024 13:43:12]
Latias spirit
Story: The Quest for the Legends (ILCOE)
Chapter: Chapter 58: Sins of the Mother
:( I hoped that Letaligon would stay. The end of this chapter gave me the chills (Or whatever you call it).
[01/12/2016 05:22:06]
mamma
Story: The Quest for the Legends (ILCOE)
Chapter: Chapter 58: Sins of the Mother
Fallegur kafli, yndislegur. Þú skrifar af mikilli dýpt og næmni. Ég get ekki gagnrýnt neitt í þessum kafla, hvet þig bara til að halda áfram á þessari braut.
[11/17/2011 18:12:39]
(anonK)
Story: The Quest for the Legends (ILCOE)
Chapter: Chapter 58: Sins of the Mother
"I think we ought to read only the kind of books that wound and stab us. If the book we are reading doesn't wake us up with a blow on the head, what are we reading it for?" Franz Kafka
I like what you are doing, Butterfree. I could have my little words here, but what would they be next to yours?
[09/26/2011 03:13:12]
tomtomtomtom
Story: The Quest for the Legends (ILCOE)
Chapter: Chapter 58: Sins of the Mother
o saddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd is chapter 58 the trollReply: What?
[09/21/2011 20:32:52]
sarahc
Story: The Quest for the Legends (ILCOE)
Chapter: Chapter 58: Sins of the Mother
…oh. My. Arceus. This is one of the best chapters I think I've ever read, Butterfree.
[08/17/2011 02:05:25]
Rotom4m
Story: The Quest for the Legends (ILCOE)
Chapter: Chapter 58: Sins of the Mother
letalligon ;_;
[08/16/2011 11:02:03]
Lucaaa
Story: The Quest for the Legends (ILCOE)
Chapter: Chapter 58: Sins of the Mother
I… I just…
I've never commented on this before (as far as I can remember), but these past few chapters have just…
They're starting to make me tear up, okay? I've really connected with your characters and now that they're all separating and fighting with each other it's really just starting to get to me.
On a side note, I'm not entirely sure why but the very end of the bit with Stantler made me want to cry. Specifically, her bit about her old trainer. It was touching.
Anyway, you're a very good writer and you're rather inspirational to me. I hope that someday my writing can be half as good as yours.
[08/13/2011 05:04:36]
Rotom4m
Story: The Quest for the Legends (ILCOE)
Chapter: Chapter 58: Sins of the Mother
;w; so beautiful…
[08/06/2011 02:38:23]
Nitro
Story: The Quest for the Legends (ILCOE)
Chapter: Chapter 58: Sins of the Mother
Oh everyone's writing emotional stuff. Well, this chapter gave me a deep sort of feeling in my tummy. I was thinking how can a epic battle have such a short chapter. Then I thought it must be in the next chapter (I never really read the update thingies). Then I thought for a second: Letaligon has a sister?? Lol. All in all, I give this chapter a 9/10.
[08/04/2011 17:19:40]
Nitro
Story: The Quest for the Legends (ILCOE)
Chapter: Chapter 58: Sins of the Mother
Did you get the name Sins of the Mother from Modern Warfare mission Sins of the Father? It's in Act 2.Reply: It is intended as a parallel to "sins of the father", but "sins of the father" is not a phrase invented by Modern Warfare; it's a common phrase and it originates from the Bible, with the whole thing about visiting the sins of the father upon the children and grandchildren and so on through the generations (God is a vengeful jerk like that).
[08/04/2011 17:15:22]
Vulpix
Story: The Quest for the Legends (ILCOE)
Chapter: Chapter 58: Sins of the Mother
Sadly, I was hoping for a great battle… sort of a letdown, but a great chapter nonetheless.
[08/03/2011 18:41:07]
SB
Story: The Quest for the Legends (ILCOE)
Chapter: Chapter 58: Sins of the Mother
…Wow. This chapter was rather depressing. I vicariously felt Letaligon's feeling of defeat when she found out her father was dead…. A great return to a nostalgic place in the story with a morbid twist.
Amazing. I would tell you to churn the next chapte out quickly, but I'd be being both rude and impatient-sounding, as well as probably annoying you. Ha.
[08/03/2011 05:08:08]
RCTMASTA
Story: The Quest for the Legends (ILCOE)
Chapter: Chapter 58: Sins of the Mother
I like how mature you manage to make such a stereotypically childish thing into. :p
great fanfic.
[07/25/2011 02:46:54]
Unknown
Story: The Quest for the Legends (ILCOE)
Chapter: Chapter 58: Sins of the Mother
Woah, what can I say … that chapter made tears sting to my eyes. It gave me chills. Each little scene built it up until the climax to the end, and I thought that was amazingly well told.
The way that her mother broke the news was surprising, but not as much as when she told Letaligon that Vigor was already dead because of her sister - I could understand what she must've felt - just like Mark realized, how her purpose was gone. That must've been absolutely crushing. I really liked Mark's advice - somthing for me as a reader to think about too … :) And I sincerly hope that she'll join Mark again. I hope that last sentence forshadows somthing …!
If I was confused by anything, it was the third last sentence - I just wasn't sure who's eyes were hardening (Letaligon's or her mother's?)
But that's all. Well, I'll try my feeble attempts at critism, but really, this chapter was amazing.Reply: Thanks! I'm glad the chapter affected you. :)
It's Letaligon's eyes that are hardening in the third last sentence; all the 'she's in that sentence refer to her. I had a bit of a hard time trying to word that in a way that was simultaneously non-awkward and unambiguous; if you have any suggestions I'd love to hear them.
[07/19/2011 03:54:33]
SilverLatios47
Story: The Quest for the Legends (ILCOE)
Chapter: Chapter 58: Sins of the Mother
I was wondering why a chapter that was supposed to have a big epic battle in it was supposed to be so short.
Just the slightest bit anti-climatic, but I'm still on my toes hoping Letaligon will be all right. Her and Jolteon are just adorable together. I think I might even draw the two.Reply: Didn't I warn you against just assuming there would be a big epic battle long ago? :P (Well, maybe it wasn't you, but I definitely warned somebody who was all asking questions about "the scene where Letaligon battles her father".)
[07/16/2011 19:54:11]
Rosethorn
Story: The Quest for the Legends (ILCOE)
Chapter: Chapter 58: Sins of the Mother
Wow… I never thought I could miss a character in a story so much… Great story, Dragonfree. I love your fanfiction. :D
[07/16/2011 17:05:23]
Ivymeleon_The_Second
Story: The Quest for the Legends (ILCOE)
Chapter: Chapter 58: Sins of the Mother
Letaligon's father wasn't a nice person, was he?
[07/16/2011 11:45:44]
Everglider
Story: The Quest for the Legends (ILCOE)
Chapter: Chapter 58: Sins of the Mother
I want to say that's cute but that wouldn't be quite right…Bittersweet, maybe. Anywaysies. that was really deep.
[07/16/2011 05:24:28]
spencer
Story: The Quest for the Legends (ILCOE)
Chapter: Chapter 58: Sins of the Mother
I was not expecting that… bravo :) VERY well put together. i think all readers will thoroughly enjoy this chapter.
[07/16/2011 04:12:55]
Pages: 1