Comments on Chapter 11: The Lizard and the Mantis

Pages: 1

Seren
Story: The Quest for the Legends (ILCOE)
Chapter: Chapter 11: The Lizard and the Mantis

I don't know if anyone else mentioned this already, but I also thought it was interesting to note how Mark thinks to talk to Scyther and introduce him to the rest of the team, while he's never so much as had a passing thought about that in regards to his other pokemon.

Reply: Mark actually sends out Sandshrew with the intention of introducing him to Charmander just after catching him! He just gets interrupted by May and then forgets about it entirely, and then makes no attempt at all to do it for Dratini.

[09/10/2018 00:41:07]

FlameTrainer13
Story: The Quest for the Legends (ILCOE)
Chapter: Chapter 11: The Lizard and the Mantis

Did you know that you left out Dratini in recap of Mark's team last chapter, and you left out Gyrados this chapter? I get why you would leave out Gyrados this chapter (with there being no water and all), but I just thought I'd let you know in case you didn't mean for it to happen. Thanks!

Reply: Dratini wasn't mentioned because so far as Mark knew, he didn't have any particular issues. It wasn't a recap of Mark's team so much as a recap of the issues of Mark's team.

[04/06/2012 02:33:16]

Neokopa
Story: The Quest for the Legends (ILCOE)
Chapter: Chapter 11: The Lizard and the Mantis

Once again, great twist regarding the feudal feelings between Charmeleon and Scyther, and im curious to find out how the story goes (regarding treachery / death / fighting etc.)

As per usual, my only improvement would be between the sentences below:

"Scyther suddenly leapt at him, his scythes raised… …Suddenly, he had no face and was throwing a black and red Pokéball at Mew"

I think that the concept of Mark having nightmarks too abrupt and over too quickly. Again, perhaps you could build suspense up before Mark realises it was just a dream, just to bulk it out a bit.

Again, just a suggestion

Neokopa

[04/19/2010 17:50:40]

mamma
Story: The Quest for the Legends (ILCOE)
Chapter: Chapter 11: The Lizard and the Mantis

Óvinir innan liðsins, hvernig fer það?

[03/28/2009 15:08:12]

Diamond
Story: The Quest for the Legends (ILCOE)
Chapter: Chapter 11: The Lizard and the Mantis

"The Gamesharked Skarmory?"
gameshark is a cheating device. hmmmm…

[09/02/2008 01:18:56]

Pages: 1