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04/21/2019: Commentary: chapter 51

Chapter 51: Fake-Out (commentary)

The commentary for chapter 51 is here! Read for anecdotes about that time I decided the characters would visit a safari and this led to me planning out the entire rest of the fic, Robin's origins as a genderswap retcon, Chaletwo forgetting about arrangements he made with Leah for reasons I can't for the life of me remember, Entei deciding on his own to spoil plot points I'd planned for chapter 75 (and for this I am grateful), some of my plans for Mitch from wayyyy before I started to figure out what was actually up with him, and me just being helplessly in love with everything Leah does.


Altissimo (04/21/2019 23:04:55)
Coming back to this after playing Pokemon Super Mystery Dungeon is kind of hilarious because there's a part in the game where the legendary beasts act extremely similar to Entei's characterization here.

(spoilers follow)

The conceit of the game is that Some Evil Mysterious Force is turning Pokemon to stone, seemingly targeting legendaries. In the middle of the game the hero and partner are targeted and turned to stone, along with Raikou and Suicune who are attempting to avenge Entei (who has already been targeted) but are not powerful enough to stop it. All of the stone Pokemon end up in this underworld hell place with each other and see evidence that it's possible to return to the world of the living, and start to head toward a point where the two worlds meet. Along the way they meet up with the legendary beasts, who act just as condescending and dismissive as Entei in this chapter. They basically hitch themselves to the heroes' wagon and demand that the heroes put themselves in danger in order to escort the beasts out of the hell land, and tell them they're bound to it because the beasts saved their lives. They also literally tell the hero and partner they're only keeping them alive because they're both individually useful to the beasts. I remember playing that for the first time and being struck by how familiar it all sounded. (See from approx. 8:15 in this video if you want to see the dialogue better than I've been explaining it -
… at the end it turns out they intended to save the heroes all along (and they actually have a good reason to believe the heroes can accomplish more than they can, but that's all tied up in the game's lore etc) but the way they act before that reveal is SO strikingly similar lol
Chibi (04/26/2019 20:13:51)
Oh man, I can't even imagine how things would have gone if the chosen reveal came during the finale. It packs so much punch here, gives you so much more time to develop Mark's crisis of faith and the core themes of the fic. Definitely one of the best deviations from the outline.

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