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07/22/2018: Commentary: chapter 5

Chapter 5: The Lake of Purity (commentary)

This time around, some things actually start happening, but only after a long sequence about exactly what buttons you press to set up a Pokédex and exactly what Mark and a hotel receptionist say to each other. I also tell you more about how bad the illegal training subplot is, how much better everything is in the IALCOTN, and how much I hated description. Also, there's May! And that one time Charmander gained two levels against a Rattata.
COMMENTARY DONE

Comments

SilverLatios(CarmineKnight) (07/22/2018 19:59:35)
I've been enjoying these so much! I was kind of refreshing the page every few hours when I realized I'd finally be home when a new commentary was released. I hope you're enjoying writing them as much as we've been reading them.
Happy (07/22/2018 21:21:03)
All the talk about what your later writing did right (plus that by ver. ialcotn the style had settled into smth pretty confident) makes me intently curious as to how much of ialcotn + late ilcoe might eventually be salvaged by the paragraph! Getting way too ahead of you in thinking about that hehe.
Butterfree (07/23/2018 12:41:21)
I'm thrilled you're enjoying it! I'm definitely having a lot of fun writing these; if I didn't tear myself away to do other things I'd honestly probably just be doing the commentary all day.

All the talk about what your later writing did right (plus that by ver. ialcotn the style had settled into smth pretty confident) makes me intently curious as to how much of ialcotn + late ilcoe might eventually be salvaged by the paragraph! Getting way too ahead of you in thinking about that hehe.
Haha, well, I can't say exactly what I'll think by the time I'd actually do another revision, but today there are chunks of the IALCOTN (especially chapter six) that read mostly fine to me and that I could in theory lift wholesale with maybe some phrasing tweaks. Which is kind of funny, considering chapter six of the IALCOTN was written in 2007, the same year I wrote the first chapters of Morphic, which I'm physically incapable of reading today.
Altissimo (07/23/2018 13:19:49)
jesus is morphic that old i refuse to believe

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